Like most things in life, I am a work in progress. I am striving to evolve into a better person. It is hard work and a daily trial. My nemesis is my patience or therefore lack of. Yep, it is there staring me in the face every time I can’t recall where I put my keys. It also flashes its smug look at me when I lose my self control over my inept abilities in the world of technology. We frequently line up like the western shoot-out determined to draw first. I am getting quicker in my attempt to stop my impatience. It is just so darn difficult because it is personal between us.
I don’t know why I pursue perfection of this very imperfect soul. I love the imperfections of life. I am much more patient with others. It is my own imperfections that I must own. So I work on it every day. Some days are better than others. There is a long list, some I can actually embrace…but impatience is hard, resilient to my requests and biddings. She is a formidable opponent.
Life is 90% mind game, wait that is golf right? Well, both are to me. Guess that is why I struggle to play golf. I am no good at it. I would love to go out there and hit (or attempt to hit) the ball without a care in the world. Laughing at my mistakes and just enjoying the time with my golf partners. Alas, golf brings out the impatience monster in me. She grows and feeds upon my lack of skill. I don’t want to tempt her to show up. Therefore, I don’t golf much at all- it is my easy way out.
I have determined to start to fight my impatience off with tolerance and kindness. Impatience does not like either. I will myself to walk away and breathe deep when she rises inside of me. I am trying. I am a work in progress. Some days are just harder than others.